5.12.10
3:10 pm
I've been reading The Walking Dead by Robert Kirkman.
It's the story of a guy named Rick and his adventures through the Zombie Apocalypse.
He's the main character and he drifts around, sometimes with a group, sometimes with just one person or whatever.
I'm in the middle of the 10th trade paperback so it's been going for quite a while.
Now, it's pretty rough.
It isn't Marvel or D.C. so they can use all the language, show all the bobbies and/or zombie slaughtering they want.
And they want, oh yes, they want.
The story isn't about, "Oh no! Zombies!!! GGGRRRAAAHHH!!!!"
Zombies are the norm; Walking Dead is about what happens to humanity when humanity dies...and comes back and starts eating you.
I was complaining to myself recently (it isn't just you that has to listen to me) that nothing really happens.
I mean, things happen; no one is really safe and they demonstrate that by having characters who have been around for months just up and die, either at the hands of the undead or some really bad humans, but there is a lot of (PUUUUUNNNNNNN!!!!) dead space in the books.
Just people looking...done.
But, the end of the 9th book, something really interesting is set up (although it's so tenuous that I can't imagine anything will come of it, or if it does it will be a total cock tease) so I'm back in.
And, in the 10th book, the main character did something that actually made my jaw drop.
Then I got to thinking about the television series they're making out of The Walking Dead.
It's going to be written and directed by Frank Darabont (The Shawmuthafuckinshank Redemption) and something other guy.
But.
It's going to be on A&E.
Have any of you seen The Sopranos edited for A&E?
I have.
It isn't The Sopranos.
It's wet noodle soup.
Now, that might be unfair as The Sopranos was made for HBO, where every original series, whether about men in prison, Jersey Mafiosos or wires, is REQUIRED BY CONTRACT to have at least five sex scenes per season and ten obscenities per episode*.
So, yeah, that might not have been the best thing to sling over to A&E.
But this show is being made for A&E.
So they're not going to have curious silences when people get really made or curious, messy fade outs when people start kissing.
They're going to have people saying "What the hell?!" and "Damn it!" and "Screw you!"
And that's normal!
When you first see the shambling, rotted remains of a human EATING another human you're going to say "what the hell?!"
When you find out that the police station you were about to raid for guns, ammo and supplies has been taken over by the aforementioned manky dreadfuls, you're going to say "damn it!"
And when someone else in our party tells you that you have to shoot your son in the head because they've been bitten and will soon turn into a ravenous walking corpse, you're going to tell that person "screw you!"
If you are on A&E.
If you want to see some pretty human and accurate reactions to these situations and more...check out The Walking Dead some time.
People don't say "damn", "hell" or "screw".
Because you don't say these things in the Zombie Apocalypse.
You say other things.
And this...is going to fetter the aforementioned television series somewhat.
Frank Darabont and other guy or not, you are going to lose a LOT of the impact of this slow moving but satisfying series but putting it on A&E.
And that is why The Walking Dead television series is going to fail.
Hey A&E....prove me wrong!!!
Also, have John Hamm show up every once in a while.
Wait...that AMC.
Hm.
Well, make it happen, you're TV.
I want to see Don Draper tear a zombie apart with his bare hands.
And eat it.
Yeah.
7:00 pm
Also, I want someone to present me with a Hip Hop or Rap album that does not ask/tell/order women to do any of the following: dance, wiggle, bounce, fuck.
Do it and I'll give you a dollar.
**************************************************
P.S. It's coming to AMC.
So.
Fuck off.
*And when I say "obscenities", I don't mean Azathoth, I mean people saying "fuck".
No comments:
Post a Comment