12.21.2009

Cock Block...of Wood


12.21.09
7:45pm
Three years from now, we're all gonna be laughing about the Apocalypse.
If I'm wrong?
I'll owe you a Coke.
Went to IFC and saw "Antichrist" last night with Christina.
Total date movie.
No.
Strike that.
Total first date movie.
It was amazing.
Brutal as fuckall, but amazing.
Turns out I am still shockable.
Thank goodness for that, I was beginning to think that that part of me was scabbed over, but no, I am still human.
After we arrived home and got done mutilating our genitals, I put on some 30 Rock, which I have been watching a hell of a lot of lately.
I saw the episode I auditioned for and I was way wrong for the part, but this means I am now in NBC's casting system.
Score.
This show is...SO brilliant...it makes me angry that NOTHING on American television now is as good as it is.
Comedy-wise anyway.
The Office is pretty funny.
Anyway.
Finished season 4 of Dexter.
Wow.
Also wrapping up the final season of Dollhouse.
See, it's the final season and not just the second because it just started hitting it's stride around the end of the first season and that's usually when Fox decides to end a show.
When it's just getting good.
So...thanks Fox.
That could have been a good show, but now I don't have to worry about it.
Thanks.
Oh, and Joss Whedon (I know you read this), next time you have an idea for a TV show, don't mention it to Fox.
Idiot.
My pizza has arrived.
And so have I.

12.16.2009

SACK UP!!!

12.16.09
3:35pm

I'm going to try saying that a lot more often.
It's just so great to yell that in someone's face for little or no reason.
"Sack up!!"
Lovely.

Christmas is a' comin'!!!!!! WHOOP WHOOP!!!!!

I have an audition tomorrow morning that requires me to be a pirate.
Not a Pirate of the Caribbean or a Butt Pirate or a Pirate of the Hershey Highway, just a regular pirate.
But that is fucking awesome.
On screen, baby.
This is going to be a shit load of fun.
They require "an excellent pirate accent".
Done and done.
Arrrrr.....

Last week, The Onion put out their "Best Music of 2009" issue with their top 20 albums of 2009...get it?
As I enjoy much of the Onion, I downloaded four selections: Andrew Bird's "Noble Beast" (haven't gotten too far into it, but I do enjoy his stuff), Neko Case's "Middle Cyclone" (although I like the album, I'm really only into her mucho when she's with The New Pornographers; yet, strangely, I really can't get into A.C. Newman's solo stuff), The Antlers' "Hospice" (a dark, thick concept album which would be better if I had the lyrics in front of me) and "Actor" by St. Vincent (which is excellent and has been on my headphones since I got it).
This woman, Annie Clark, was with Polyphonic Spree and some other band of that ilk and then put out her own album in 2007 called "Marry Me".
In 2009, she did "Actor".
I've been listening to her first one and it's all right, but not as solid as "Actor".
You should check her out.
She's kind of ethereal yet classic with really great instrumentation and programming.
The Onion mentioned Kate Bush in the write-up, but I don't like Kate Bush, so I suppose they were just commenting on the eccentric feel of St. Vincent.
I think I might stop checking out the older stuff from bands I get into.
Walkmen, Charlotte Gainsbourg and St. Vincent are just three of the host of bands whose earlier stuff is not as great as their latest or later work.
Or so think I.
And this album that everyone seems to be squirting over for best of the year, "Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix" by Phoenix?
Man, I tried and I might try again, but I just don't get it.
Their voices are so whiny...

Also, somehow, the new Eels, "End Times", leaked a month early.
You know you're getting popular when your album leaks a fucking month before the release date.
I've only gone through it all at once one time, but I was mistaken about E pulling a fast one like he did with "Hombre Lobo".
See, before "Hombre Lobo" came out, he released "Fresh Blood" as a single.
It was the only song on the album that sounded ANYTHING like it, all programmed drums, synths, etc., the rest was very stripped down with seldom more than three other instruments, usually guitar, bass and drums and I thought that maybe E was going to do the same switcheroo thing by releasing "Little Bird", a SUPER stripped down song, as the first single from "End Times" and then surprise fans with a thick, rich, layered album to follow.
That is not the case.
It's not as stripped down as "Hombre Lobo", but it's no "Souljacker".
In the pre-release write-ups, some people have been saying that this is the new Electro-Shock Blues and some have been saying this is the "after" to Lobo's "before".
As far as the subject matter, it is absolutely the latter.
Musically, it's a lot more like "Daises of the Galaxy" then anything else E's ever done.
Sadly, there's not a whole lot of innovation in either the music or the depth of his lyrics, but it isn't horrible.
Daises wasn't my favorite when it came out, but now I enjoy just as much as his other stuff, so we'll see.
Even Lobo, which I didn't really dig, sounds better with time.
It'll be interesting to see of the general public suddenly like Eels now because of this album.
Guess we'll see in January....

And finally, I just got my first $100 haircut at a place on Ludlow called Pumps & Pinups.
Apparently, I need to add some sort of gelid muck to my hair to recreate the effect.
That's probably not going to happen.
I just may be the laziest actor I know.

12.11.2009

I Am Electric Booooy

12.11.09
4:37 pm
Not really.
I'm not really Electro Booooy.
The skinny guy from The Mighty Boosh is.
I was pleasantly astounded earlier today to learn that eels' "Little Bird" (a track from their upcoming 2010 release "End Times") has been voted as one of the best songs of 2009 (www.spinner.com/2009/11/25/top-2009-songs/).
I mean, as far as I know, 94.467% of the world doesn't know anything by eels except for "that Novocain song where they're floating", "that 'goddamn right' song from Road Trip" and "the creepy growly voiced songs in the 'Shrek' movies".
Way to go, world.
And, of course, I know that these lists don't really mean anything except for the fact that one of my favorite bands is getting some attention. I used to be torn about whether it's good or bad for one's favorite bands that not a lot of people know about to get better known (man what a clunky start to a sentence...AND I'M NOT THROUGH YET!!!!!!!!!!); on one hand, if they're too little known, they disappear from lack of attention and money, but if they get too well known, you get the posers and Johnny-Come-Latelys (fuck, I love that term...I have just decided that the loser in a game of Ooky Cookie is called Johnny-Come-Lately...spread the word.) and their ticket prices and such go up and, god forbid, they sell out and start making shit.
But, I think the great thing about the five bands I really truly dig is that they don't make shit.
At least in my opinion.
That's actually something I was thinking about the other day; Nine Inch Nails' "The Fragile" set a record for dropping the furthest the quickest on the Billboard charts.
It debuts at #1 and the next week it's in...maybe the 30's? Not sure, but it was a big deal at the time.
Thing is: I have NO idea why. I get that it wasn't "The Downward Spiral 2" and that it lost a lot of fans, but, it was a new, 23-track Nine Inch Nails album after NOTHING substantial for five fucking years! It had more depth, dimension, textures, themes and everything than Spiral did and, although I know the headbangers who jerked off violently to "March of the Pigs" were pissed and took their ball and went home, I would have thought that NIN had a smarter, more open-minded, more dedicated audience.
AND it was very well reviewed except for the occasionally use of "bloated" or "overlong".
Why was this considered such a bomb?
Even Reznor said he didn't like it, albeit years and albums later.
Meh.
Who knows.
I'm way too close to offer an opinion.
Going back to the odd success of "Little Bird" (a simple, two minute, four-track recording), I'm happy, very, but confused, also very.
The second "single","In My Younger Days" is also, IMHOLOLROFLPUKE, great, but, just like "Little Bird", it feels typically eels, like what they've been doing since they were just E in a basement in L.A.
Shit, he's still just E in a fucking basement in L.A.
Why is this song suddenly the sixth best song of the year?!
I'm going to stop fretting about it.
Let go and let God, that's what I always say.
Let the fuck go and let the fuck God.
Let the fuck get ourselves some mozzarella sticks, na'mean?

Aaaaaalmost...

Okay.
Lady Gaga is quite spectacular.

http://www.youtube.com/user/ladygagaofficial?blend=1&ob=4

If only her music and lyrics were more interesting, she'd have a fan in me.
And that remix Manson did with her sucks sweaty Twiggy taint.

12.09.2009

Let me call Regina...THAT'S who I have to call.

12.9.09
3:29 pm
A proper response to this journal entry's title might be: Who the fuck is Marcus?
To which I respond: I know, I know, I don't know, I know.
And.
Just listening to the new Charlotte Gainsbourg album, "IRM", today. This album was a collaboration with Beck and it's some pretty tight shit.
He's done for her dreamy, French ephemera what Reznor did for Manson's dreamy, French ephemera on "Antichrist Superstar", namely: he made it better.
Seriously though.
Her "first" album in 2006, "5:55", was a bit too dreamy and French for my tastes. I appreciate the French language, it's so goddamn beautiful and liquid, but neither the music nor the instrumentation was really grabbing me.
How to make your music more interesting?
Beck it up, Frenchy.
And, yes, it sounds, more or less, like a Beck album sung by some French chick (he pops in occasionally), but that's excellent because there's some things that Beck really can't do, like sound beautiful and fae in French.
Plus she looks like that chick with no ear lobe from the Bond movie where the bad guy has a bullet in his brain.
You know?
So, she's pretty beautiful.
In fact, the French in general (or maybe just in Nice and Monaco) are a stunningly beautiful people.
There was this girl on the Bacardi shoot named Clemens?
Laws a mussy!
Po'k salad Annie!!!
Gator's gotcha granny!!!
CHOMP CHOMP!!
And she's also in this movie "Antichrist" starring Willem DaFoe and some terrible things happen in a cabin in the woods...so...yeah.
Charlotte Gainsbourg, not Clemens.
Also watched the new eels video for "In My Younger Days", a track from the new new album.
Man, can this fellow write a crushingly depressing song.
Just the other day I found a torrent for E's 1985 demo.
It's a full, 14-track album called "Bad Dude In Love".
It. Is. Horrendous.
Mostly.
The middle few tracks are actually kind of fun, but, fuck me, has he come a long way.
It's...it sounds like a joke.
Like someone challenged him to make a stupid, shallow, 80's pop album.
And he won that challenge.
Xmax.
I forgot to eat breakfast today.
My tummbly rummbly!!!
Just a few weeks 'til Christmas and the Wedding.
Had a total panic freak out when I thought my passport was expired last night.
But we're good.
1/20/10.
As long as I'm not kidnapped or made some sort of God King while I'm there.
Or as long as I'm rescued/deposed by the 20th.
Whatever.

12.02.2009

Rev. Punk


12.2.09
3:31 pm
I think a man of the cloth (or is it Cloth?) just tried to punk me.
This Reverend who works here just contacted me (via the phone, not the Holy Ghost) to make a call (a phone call, not a Call to the priesthood) for him.
He gave the number, not in the normal cadence of 1 718 387 6962, but rather 17 183 876 962.
Normally, I would just chalk it up to...something, but this guy, the dozen or so times I've spoken to him on the phone, has always been a touch surly towards me.
Which is odd because I'm just as snuggly as a button.
It begs the question (something I do NOT like to do, ordinarily): what have I done to slight him?
What have I done to so vex this Servant of JEEEEEZUS?
What could I have possibly done to rouse the grrrreat vengeance and fuurrrrrious anger of this Bible Biting Boner Bag?
Have I just answer mine own question?
Mayhaps I have...mayhaps I have.
I might just ask him, if he calls back, to hear my confession and they just make up some weird shit, like I had sex on his überhetero son.
That ought to clear the air.
Also, on a totally unrelated tip: I am enjoying an excellent piece of carrot cake.
*Jeeeezus loves the little chiiiiildrun....*

12.01.2009

Damn, McG...You Go Boy


12.1.09
3:29 pm
See? November's done.
Last night I watched "Terminator Salvation" (no colon as I had thought) and, damn, McG can direct a flashy ass action movie like NO ONE'S bidness.
This is the guy that was a music video director before he did the two Charlie's Angels movies.
And boy can this guy handle a big ass movie.
We FINALLY got a fist fight between two Terminators.
Also, there was a pretty amazing helicopter crash shot from over the pilot's shoulder, not to mention a shit load of new models of Terminator.
Big ass action movie.
Plot-wise?
Uh...did I mention the fact that this is a huge action movie?
Yeah.
Apparently, there's going to be two more McG directed, Bale Terminator movies.
I'm indifferent.
Although this was a huge ass flashy ass action bukkake film, there was about as much substance as a Twinkee.
But I like Twinkees.
So yeah.