On Friday...I met THE ONE. Not the Matrix One...but the ONE One...her name was Emily (I think). Although loquacious, she was not fat. It was love at first sight (on her part at least, it took me a few hours). She was scared of me because of what Tyler had told her of me, but despite the fear she was enamored. Then I was invited into the Spanish soap opera that fell apart a bit once the other 35 people (90% of which we did not know) showed up. Before they did though, I was made more beautiful than every woman in the world by the combined efforts of Tyler and my eternal love. The night was...glorious. We had planned to meet in the park and dine the next evening under the watchful eye of Madame Tyler where I planned to spill a pickle broth on M. Tyler's dress so I could have an awkward moment alone with my love...I would have given her my ring and my heart......but.....it was never to be. She and M. Tyler had other plans....plans with two other women....Mary Jane and her cousin La Thargy...and now Emily is gone...like smoke...weed smoke....from their risen clogged pipes...or maybe Tyler was afraid she would steal me from her and decided to sabotage our love...god this is boring me.
Anyway, I got my keyboard yesterday so I am going to have lots of fun. I need topics on which to write songs so I can film them and put them here on my web site (not that we aren't still celebrating Kaitlyn's birthday but shit. Yeah, so the whole point of this update was that I have a keyboard. Rock on.
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