I'm in the mood for love...SIMPLY...because you're near me!!

3.18.09
9:21pm
THAT is how powerful your sexy is!

Mere proximity encourages full turgidity!

Congrats!

Big MUNNY!

The song isn't "I'm in the mood for love, simply because you're clutching my John Johnson", NO!

We're talking lonely-inexperienced-teenage-boy-watching-his-secret-crush-buy-an-apple-from-the-cafeteria-fruit-stand reaction here!

Cannae control his self!

He cannae doot!

He cannae!!

That's what you're working with...ON A DAILY BASIS.

Shiz, niz, I'd never get anything done!

The merest hint of a reflective surface and I'd be off like pants afire!

Whoosh!

Porkchop sandwiches!

No mirrors or spoons allowed!

Done!

Now...you might (but are most likely not) be asking: Paolo, why be you so happy, eh? What deal be? Good hair day? GREAT hair day? Just how great...IS your hair today? Me want know! Me want know NOW!"

You MIGHT be thinking that.

And, let me tell you, it has nothing at all to do with my hair.

Unless you're referring to the "hair-like" axons in my brain as "hair"...which would be convoluted at best.

No, I'm not even having that great of a day, really.

Just sort of a regular type day groove.

But here's the thing...

On Sunday, Ray lent me Fallout 3, a HUGE (in the sense of width, depth and breadth) PS3 game which I have been enjoying ever since.

It takes place in a post-apocalyptic landscape etc etc.

I have also been watching Battlestar Galactica (and enjoying it) in which two main characters were boxing in a recent episode.

I have ALSO also been watching the start of the third "volume" of Heroes, in which this bald pyrokenetic showed up who reminds me of Butterbean (the redneck boxer guy).

All these components were mushed together into a tasty little botargo upon which I nibbled last night (well, this morning actually.  I played Fallout from 1 in the morning to 7ish today).

And the result?

My brain is convinced of something that is not happening and may never happen, but it has greatly improved my outlook on life.

At least temporarily.

And hey, if you're not living in the now, you're probably dead or an accountant.

I am neither, so I am happy.

Just a long, tangential romp to say just how much I dig my brain at this particular moment.

Go brain!

Go!!

And.  There's.  More.

Even though I have just recently finished the Inchoate Trilogy, I had another idea "just pop in there" like Ray (Stanz, not Zablocki) calling up the image of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man at the end of Ghostbusters.

A hell of a long time ago, I decided to try to decode an Edward Gorey piece entitled The Chinese Obelisk.

In it, birdlike creatures fly past shattered or incomplete stone structures on a grayish background with strips of cloth in their mouths.

On each piece of cloth is a word.

There are about 80 total.

The words range from the mundane (glue) to the superarchaic (imbat) to the arboreal (jequirity) to the astronomical (gegenschein) and everywhere in between.

I had copied down each of the words to find definitions because I was excited to tighten my grasp on the English language.

Then I forgot about the project utterly.

Until today.

My new project will be called "The Chinese Obelisk" and will consist of 23 short films based on 23 of the words from Gorey's piece.

While the Inchoate Trilogy was never really meant to be taken seriously in ANY way, shape or form, these will actually have something more to them.

At least I hope.

These are going to range from shorts to soundscapes to whatever I think fits the word in question.

It should keep me busy for a while.

Along with that, I laid some vocals down (that means recorded some vocals to those not "in the biz"..."the biz" meaning the entertainment industry) on Ray's (Zablocki, not Stanz) sonic gangbang the other day (the working title is "Duckernauts") and, just yesterday, I wrote full on lyrics for it.

He and I will reconvene to record them soon.

At the same session, I also recorded some lyrics I'd had written for some months for a song called "These Are Some Things".

It's all mine and, at some point, that's going to pop up on the George Washington Diarrhea myspace site.

AND, there is a certain special li'l hedgehog out there who will soon have her very own theme song, although I think ditty fits more with the music and tone of the thing.

But I don't think she even knows this journal exists so this paragraph is thus rendered moot.

TASTE the mootness.

Mmmm...mooty.

Also yesterday, my shimmering, glimmering O&O managed to Morselate the anus of the Internet and score her and I two tickets each to two dates on what is to be the last Nine Inch Nails tour for what might be a very long time.

They are touring with Jane's Addiction (which I give not a shit about) and, yes, they're calling it the NIN/JA tour.

Merch stand, here I come.

Then there's the Cake show a week before the NIN show.

Not sure I mentioned this, but I haven't seen them in OVER ten years.

I hear John McCrea has become less of a douchebag, to his fans at least.

They're playing at Terminal 5 where Chris and I saw eels on their last tour and it's a great venue.

It's strange, I always held Cake and eels on the same level of fame in my mind and the fact that they are both playing at the same place just cements that construct.

What's ALSO strange is that THREE of my favorite bands got Grammy nominations this years as well.

Rock on, synchronicity.

And speaking of which, TMBG is having their sixth in an apparently never-ending series of shows at Le Poisson Rouge (and their seventh is planned for the Saturday after the Cake show).

Not sure if I'm going.

Quite frankly, there's no one left to go with.

I've gone to four of the six thus far and had a great time at each, but I'd also been with one or more people at each one.

I'll play it by ear.

Next, the Ghostbusters video game, which is fully sanctioned by, written by and voice acted by all four of the original cast plus Walter Peck and Janine Melnitz is coming out in June and I am pretty goddamn excited.

Even more so since Ray (Zablocki, not Stanz) informed me that, because of all the hype surrounding the game (which was to replace a third movie), they are actually going to do a third Ghostbusters movie.

Normally, I would have a violently adverse reaction to this based on such brilliant let's-do-the-sequel-over-two-motherfucking-decades-after-the-last-one-came-out examples such as Indiana Jones, Star Wars and whatever other bags of shit the Hollywood childrapers are responsible for bringing us, but Dan Akroyd and Harold Ramis are SO dedicated to the source material that I can't see this turning bad.

One thing though: if there is even a whisper of aliens being included in the script...I will kill Dan Akroyd and that bee stung tubster Harold Ramis with my bare, throbbing erection.

The game is being released in conjunction with the Blu Ray version of the original Ghostbusters movie.

Teh w00t.

And finally, Philip and I were jabbering the other day and stumbled upon the fact that so many (all?) Prince lyrics could be adopted as mission statements, mottos, life lessons, religious tenants etc.

Here's a handful:

"If it breaks when it bends, you'd better not put it in."

"Look up in the air! It's your guitar!"

Call (in ecstatic, zealous tones): "You could be the President!"

Response (smug, dismissive): "I'd rather be the Pope."

"We don't have to make children to make love. And we don't have to make love to have an orgasm."

"I don't want to take my clothes off...but I've got to..."

Pick and choose, combine them all or find your own: if you take His words to heart, then you will truly be His Chosen.

But you can't touch people who aren't Jehovah's Witnesses.

Or at least I think that's how it goes.

There was a Jehovah's Witness working here when I started and she wouldn't touch ANYONE unless they were also Chosen.

Or maybe she was just a bitch.

For more information about the Church of Purple, go and watch Graffiti Bridge.

It's fucking horrible, but you get to see a "spiritual" Prince.

Warning: it's creepier than "normal" Prince.

That's all.

Go in Peace, to Love and Serve the Lord.