A review of Maxi Bacon's "Maci Baxon"

You know those albums of classical music made for in utero babies? This eats those, shits them out and then eats them again. Some of my most uncomfortable listening experiences have come courtesy of Mindless Self Indulgence, Coil and Error, to name a few. But even those artists had BPMs.

I don't want to spoil the surprise for you or color your time with Maci Baxon, so I'll just touch on some highlights. A lot of this album sounds as if someone stomped on a bunch of CDs and then stapled the bits together. The first track alone contains some hip hop, some Looney Toons  and some circus music. Over the course of the nine track, twenty-six minute album, crafted lovingly/hatefully by Scott Sinclair (aka Company Fuck) and Freeka Tet (aka Sgure), you'll encounter total eradication in the jaws of an inexorable metal mouth, robots having diarrhea, an old car with whooping cough, tape decks vomiting, the death throes of a handful of small kitchen appliances, and, finally, Frank SInatra telling you that he's going to love you.

Standouts include "analchemy"*, which, in whatever nightmare world this is considered pop music, would be the radio single, "a666 tamagotchihunter 
pikootee raper gnochi cooker pouik wheeler kuchipatchi trasher" and "careless
 sniffle", which centers around someone with a cold singing George Michael's 
"Careless Whisper" while, in the left channel, we hear some creature 
gleefully eating a watermelon...or performing cunnilingus** before suffering 
a grand mal seizure. The right channel stars some tiny things farting. This is the longest and most hilarious track on the album.

One thing I can say without a shred of doubt: Maxi Bacon are the finest crafters of robotic bodily functions I have ever experienced. I have never heard anything like this and never want or need to again. What would be the point? I've seen the singularity, and it's scored by Maxi Bacon.





* A fantastic and horribly intriguing elision, no?

** Or performing cunnilingus on a watermelon, I suppose.