5.15.2013

Here's A Little Movie 'Bout Dongs...And Hearts

I'm trying very hard to remember just why I wanted to check out Magic Mike...
But I cannot.
So let's just get this thing going: I watched Magic Mike last night. Originally, I was planning to watch it on my own (in case there were any embarrassing and confusing boners), but Chris ended up watching it with me.
See, she didn't get the appeal of male strippers (neither did I), but, by the end of this two hour movie...she kind of did.
I still do not.

A few things regarding Magic Mike: Tampa was the best setting for this; it was always washed out and seedy and desperate...just like Tampa.

When Mike casually mentions that, over the past six years he has only socked away $13,000, the movie lost a lot for me.
Let's break this down: Mike HAS to be making AT least $400 a night at the strip club (and that is a conservative estimate), the cost of living in Florida is dirt fucking cheap, he's running three other businesses and yet he only manages to put away a little over two thousand a year? Break that down even further and that's about $183 a month, about $42 a week and about $6 a day! That's, like, two less beers when you go out at night!
Then, there's the fact that all Mike wants it to stop stripping and make his silly furniture...even though you only see three pieces in the entire film and you NEVER see him building ANYTHING!

Wait.

Ami I missing the point of this movie?
It's that male strippers have it a LOT easier than female strippers, right?
Yes?
Okay, good.

Anyway, I've never seen him in anything else, but Tates is just the charmingest stripper I have ever seen.

Along with Magic Dong, I also finished the sixth and seventh season of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, the last two episodes of which reveal A LOT.
The Waitress' name*, Mac's name and that Dennis, after all the hinting and dancing around it, really DOES appear to be about two bad sexual encounters away from being an actual serial killer.
Other highlights from these seasons include the entirety of "Chardee MacDennis" (they need to do one of these per season), Charlie's simple question to Santa Claus, the manifestations of some of the...things from Charlie's "Dram Bok", the Jersey Shore episode (mainly beause they shot most of it in Ocean City, NJ, the site of BEECHOUZATRONICON XMAX ), plus the addition of both Mary Lynn Rajskub as Gail the Snail (SUCH A FUN PERFORMANCE) and Jason Sudeikis as Smitty.

Looking forward to seeing where they go with the serial killer thing...

Along with all this television and film that I've been watching like a PRO, I'm happy to announce that The Electromagnetic Theater will be launching soon and available on iTunes in a month or so.
This is the podcast/radio show thing I worked on a few months ago in which I play a whole bunch of different characters.
You can head over to http://electromagnetictheater.com/ for more info, although the site isn't up yet.
Don't worry, I'll let you know.
DON'T WORRY.
DON'T.

Shhhhh....





* It's inferred and I wouldn't be surprised if turns out to be a red herring.

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