Sitting on some off-to-the-side stairs at a place called "Vanity House" at the moment*. I am going to try and make it my job to stay the fuck out of everyone's way as much as I can. These poor bastards are going to have to look at me (and, in some horrific, extreme cases, TOUCH me) for the next three weeks, so I should spare them when able.
Plus, sitting and looking stoically out at the horizon lends a sense of thoughtful depth and quiet majesty that I shall immediately dispel the instant I open my mouth and people get to know the real me.
The Pig Man me.
To that point, here are some potential Avengers-related porn titles I came up with while trying to fall asleep at 8:45 last night, at which point, yes, the sun was still up.
Captain Slam Erica
The Incredible Girth
Thor Puthy
Iron Manhood
(Gi)Ant-Man
The Aven-Gerbils-Up-Their-Asses
Doctor Strange
Pretty happy with the gerbils one...
Note: there are a lot of birds around here. Which shouldn't be too weird, considering this place is called Eagle Rock **. For that reason, I am not suspicious of their intentions yet, but getting there.
12:58 pm
I did not expect that the hardest part of the first day of shooting would be me, getting into the driver's seat of a fucking car. Car seats without a huge goddamn steering column in the middle of them are hard enough, but this? It bordered on slapstick.
Just enjoyed lunch and, so far, things are going great, a well oiled machine.
Speaking of oiled, I am somehow not sweating as much as I thought I would be. MUST BE THAT FUCKING DRY HEAT EVERY ASSHOLE ON THE WEST COAST IS ALWAYS FUCKING TALKING ABOUT.
There are so many people on this set and it's a goal of mine to remember everyone's name, but, as I am a famous actor now, I am compelled to just give them numbers. And then forget the numbers.
Also, a select group of my friends will be happy to know I learned how to say "YAAAAAASSS!" in ASL.
I keep getting told that I "look amazing on camera", something I first took as a compliment, but now, I'm just wondering how monstrous I look when not on camera. Sufficiently monstrous, judging by the awe and delight in these people's voices, I imagine.
And, before I forget, if you read this and if you do social media, please do follow us @YouAndMeMovie on Twattle and Instagrok. It will make us feel loved and you feel gracious.
More later, norms.
* And, while it does sound like somewhere a murder would take place, it is actually our hair and make up and etc location.
** Looking for the "Eagle Rock Lounge" from Cake's "Mustache Man".
No comments:
Post a Comment