A review of "Watch Dogs" for the PS4

Finished Watch Dogs for the PS4.

Here's some thoughts.

The game designers must have been overjoyed when the whole NSA thing happened while they were making this game.

As a voice actor, I allowed to say this: dude doing Aiden Pierce is fucking horrible. I want him to just clear his throat and take a little sip of water EVERY TIME HE OPENS HIS DULL, FUCKING MOUTH. 

I am impressed with how he managed to sound both nasally and gravely at the same time. Must have been harder than Tuvan throat singing.

Facial animation and hair looks like top-of-the-line PS2 graphics.

Then there's Lisbeth Salander. Who is in the game. Because Ubisoft thought no one would notice?

Also, B-Real (from Cypress Hill) is in the game. With dreadlocks.

Driving: what is worse, drinving on a road made of ice in a car made o glassor vice versa? Whichever is worse is what it's like to drive in this game. In an open world game where you need to drive, make the driving good.

Regarding the soundtrack: why haven't we seen a GTA or Saints Row or Watchdogs where the player can use music from their hard drive as a custom radio station?

It's 2014.

I remember some games on fucking PSOne where you could take the game disc out and have your own CD playing instead of the game's soundtrack. How has this technology devolved?

The moment when "C.R.E.A.M." by Wu Tang starts playing though...I don't think I ever realized how much old school Wu mitigates things.

After getting past how it looks and diving head first into the side stuff, I had fun.

This game could have originally been the future Assassins' Creed we're never going to get. 

Like so much. 

The ctOS towers are the viewpoints, the maps are both just as choked with stuff, the pointless and interchangeable clothes, the different types of weapons, the number of times I tried to take someone down silently and ended up standing on the box I was hiding behind because THE FUCKING BUTTON FOR TAKING SOMEONE DOWN SILENTLY AND CLIMBING UP ON A BOX IS THE SAME FUCKING BUTTON.

I really liked the Gang Hideouts.  Since I'm bad at games, I enjoy being able to pure stealth. The camera puzzles are also a great touch

Jordi is fun. Should have been more Jordi.

Lucky Quinn's teeth are their own character.

The digital trips. You can feel the time and love put into them. If Ubisoft were more bastardy than they already are, I could see them releasing these as some separate thing.

While I don't know/love/enjoy at all a lot of the music, I love the way you obtain it, love it.

At one point, hours in, there was still a lot of stuff to do. Was it all fun or worth it? Meh. 

There's more I could say, but the overall feeling is as follows: some of the interactions and mechanics, the stealth and camera systems were great, a lot of fun, but most everything else was not.

And, while the credits did an admirable* job of planting at least a dozen seeds for the inevitable flood of yearly sequels, I want nothing to do with any of them.

I can't think of a more forgettable game.

Wu Tang can only ameliorate so much.

* Read "desperate".