4.02.2012

End of the Month Music Bitchfest - March 2012

COURTNEY LOVE ON HER PERIOD

Beck

I’m…I’m sorry…what? A new what? A new…Beck song?!
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
Yes.
March 20th, Beck released “Looking For A Sign”, a song recorded for the soundtrack for the new comedy Jeff, Who Lives At Home.
It’s an okay song, feels a bit Mutations, a bit Sea Change.
Nothing to get too excited about, sadly.
But, hey, at least he isn’t dead.
Unless he died and his label released this song posthumously.
Which would be awful.

Cake
Cake released a pretty half-assed video for one of my favorite songs off their latest album. It's 95% fans lip syncing to the song and maybe 5% flickered clips of the band smiling at how clever they are when it comes to music videos that A. don't cost them anything, B. are eco-friendly and C. make them look clever.
Guys, it was pretty novel in 2001, when you did something singular and wacky and non-formulaic for the "Short Skirt, Long Jacket" video, but some time has passed and you're not going to reinvent the medium so HURRY UP AND MAKE A NEW GOD DAMN ALBUM YOU LAZY HIPPY CUNTRAGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They Might Be Giants
Finishing up their Join Us tour with an amazing show at Terminal 5, They Might Be Giants have certainly earned a rest…which they have declined to take.
Between now and early 2013, the band will release THREE brand new EP’s (two adult and one for kids) and a brand new album (expected early 2013).
THAT is what I’m talking about.
Looking forward to periodic updates from TMBG regarding there “working vacation” and the sporadic perks from becoming a Super President member of this year’s They Might Be Giants Instant Fan Club.
To read said review of said TMBG show, scroll down said.

Nine Inch Nails
So...I guess...maybe Reznor forgot about the new How To Destroy Angels album...?


On March 7th, Los Angeles’ KROQ played the first single off the new (totally real and actually coming out) album by
Marilyn Manson.

The song is called “No Reflection” and it made, literally, no impression on me.
You ever have that happen?
It’s like you find yourself at the bottom of a page but without being able to remember actually having read it?
This song is like that, but, rather than being distracted and not absorbing the information, as with a book, this was just so…not mentionable.

I gave it a few more tries to see if there was something making it disappear from my mind, but, nope, it’s just not strong enough to leave any sort of impression.
Although, I did, eventually figure out that the chorus sounds almost exactly like the chorus from another forgettable Marilyn Manson song from the equally forgettable “High End Of Low” album, namely “Leave A Scar”.
I would say you should listen to the choruses of both just to see what I mean, but that wouldn’t do anyone any good and you’d have listened to two bad Marilyn Manson songs, so please don’t.
I just hope that “No Reflection” wasn’t the song early reviewers were calling "super catchy… could do the K-ROQ rounds", because, if so, this is going to be yet another squirty fart from Manson’s shitty ass.

On March 23rd, Manson posted the cover art and track listing for his new “effort”.
I’m not even going to bother posting this ridiculous bunch of song titles because you’ll think I just made them up.
I will, however, make an official declaration: the new Marilyn Manson album will be awful.
Not as awful as “Eat Me, Drink Me”, but perhaps as awful or more awful than “The High End Of Low”.
I’m not just basing this on one song and the track list…here’s a quote from Manson regarding his new album: 

It's the first record where I repeat verses. I just sing the words in a different key the next time. I've never done that before, because I've always felt like I needed to write a lot of words in the past …”

Wait…what? No, that’s not how it works. What “key”? What “sing”? You haven’t “sung” in “key” since…ever. You lack that ability.
You have different sounds you’re able to make, mostly pertaining to volume and pitch, but you can’t sing, Marilyn…
You can whisper, growl, scream, croak, bark, yell, husk, howl, screech and squeak…but not sing…
*sigh*
Does ANYONE have this guy’s phone number?
I think we need to talk.


Garbage dropped their first single, “Blood For Poppies”, on the 20th as a free download from their site, www.garbage.com.
And it is VERY…poppy!
BWA HA HAHA HA H AH AH AH AHA HA HA HAHH AH A!!!!!!
No, it’s not that great.
It’s a little too radio friendly (just listen to the bright, shimmery chorus to understand what I mean) and doesn’t stack up to
the majority of their singles they’ve released over the years.

It just doesn’t have that edge usually associated with their music
The band can still play, but nothing about the track really grabbed me.
I’m not judging the book by the cover though as Butch Vig is a god and Shirley Manson is a goddess.
The video for "Blood For Poppies" comes out April 3rd.

At the end of March, the band released their first UK single, "Battle In Me".
Now this, THIS sounds like classic Garbage, but with some modern studio tweaks.
Good stuff.

 
Meanwhile, the E-starved twink buried deep within me (helllooo) had an urge to hear the new Madonna album.
I heard that single and, as much as it made me want to destroy my radio and every device capable of broadcasting said single in a ten miles radius, it was catchy as all get out.
So I listened to the new Madonna album, MDNA, which I thought might have something to do with genetics, but apparently not.

Listening to the new Madonna album can be equated to eating a huge bag of Jolly Ranchers and glitter, then vomiting, then listening to said sparkling, rainbow-colored effluvia while in a club. Her lyrics here reflect nothing of her 12,000 years of pop queendom. In fact, if Britney Spears had recorded and released this album ten years ago, it might have been ground-breaking, but in Madonna’s case…it’s almost like she recalls nothing of her career, it’s like she’s starting over; not in a good or fresh way, on the contrary, it sounds laughably naïve.

This album has depth like a mosquito bite: you scratch it, it feels good in a bad way, then it gets infected and scabby. There are one or two interesting moments on here (“Falling Free” and “I Fucked Up”) and you can not deny the contagious (like the Motaba virus) nature of “Give Me All Your Loving” (I’ll not rape the English language on your behalf, you craggy bint), but I couldn’t help feeling a sense of annoyance while listening to this, as if I were be put upon somehow.

At the end of one of the two songs that grunty, spazzy rapper Nicki Minaj guest stars on, she informs the listener that “there is only one queen” and that “it’s Madonna…bitch.” That last word is almost spat between her gritted teeth, not
sounding emphatic here, like a statement of fact,…only desperate, as if saying it loudly and angrily enough will make it
so…but it won’t. And neither will removing letters from your name.


And, finally, Damon Albarn's latest side project (with Flea and Tony Allen), "Rocket Juice and The Moon", came out on
March 27th.

Okay...maybe I don't like funk, but this whole thing really feels kind of flat.
There are familiar faces from some Gorillaz album guesting on vocal, as well as one or two tracks with Albarn singing (and
every time I hear his voice I picture 2D), but overall nothing is really standing out here.

I'm blaming myself more than the artists involved.
I just don't like Damon Albarn doing funk.
Probably wouldn't like Nine Inch nails doing country either.
I wish this had been something I dug, but, whatever, it's a side project.
Next up: some new Gorillaz.

As it turns out, I haven't been obsessively overlistening to anything this month.
Maybe the medication is working...

No comments: