Gherkin Jerkin'

8.18.11
8:27 pm

I'm going to be up front about this: this is nothing in this post about either masturbation or pickles.
I swear to God.
And you.
Nothing.

Last night I watched a movie that you may not have heard of.
It's called Burke and Hare and is a comic retelling of the story of 19th century Irish grave robbers, William Burke and William Hare.
It's also happens to be an Anglophile wet dream.
It stars Simon Pegg, Andy Cirkus, Bill Bailey, Tom Wilkinson, Jessica Hynes, Christopher Lee, Ronnie Corbett and motherfucking Tim Curry.
Plus a whole slew of BBC heroes that those more British than I will instantly recognize.
It was hilarious and well done and just ducky.
Cheeky, even.
I don't think it was ever released here in theaters, but hopefully it'll pop up on DVD and you can Netflix it.
Or download it illegally from a torrent site.
Which would be wrong.
Tasty wrong.

SPEAKING OF TASTY WRONG.
I just had, apparently, the best steak burger in the world.
It was a Texas Steak Burger", meaning it was smothered in smoked bacon, cheddar cheese and the establishment's "Uncommon BBQ Sauce".
Quick aside: I don't really like when the adjective describing a sauce I'm about to ingest is "uncommon".
Anyway.
It certainly was a burger.
The bacon was there, the cheese, not as much and the BBQ sauce was...well, zingy.
Not uncommon.
Zingy.
I don't run the restaurant though, so I suppose the descriptor "uncommon" will have to stay...for now.
There were also waffle fries that tasted like waffle fries and a slice of Key Lime pie (hardly worth $4.99 unless it is Tardis Key Lime pie*...which would be great), but I'm saving that until I no longer smell BBQ sauce on my fingers.

What I'm reading?
Why, thank you for asking!
I've jumped back into Hodgman's Areas of My Expertise which has gotten more enjoyable.
Finally.
Once I've used it up, I just might give in and read the latest Dresden book.

I've also been reading Philip Tucker's The Grind Show...into a microphone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT WWHHHAAAAAATTTTTTTT??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last night I recorded the twenty-fifth chapter (of forty-one) and I'm going to focus on banging out one chapter a night until I am fucking DONE.
I am motivated by equal parts frustration at how long this project is taking and excitement to pass this onto the author and then the Unwashed (and Washed) Masses.
Chapter 25 was a good one, and, after a short respite in Chapter 26, the next few are Action Packed.
And I mean Demon Action.

Also watched the Adam West/Burt Ward Batman movie a few nights ago.
You know...I laughed almost the whole time.
I must have watched that movie ten times a month as a kid, but I never really got the fact that the whole thing is a huge joke.
It's hilarious.
I would actually love to see Grant Morrison do a remake of it.
As in, I'd like to see him remake the plot into something terrifying and mind bending, maybe keeping a bit of the ridiculous wink-wink humor, but mostly to see him make this silly slapfest into something dark.

Ugh.
My fingers still smell of BBQ sauce.
Which would be fine if I could suck it off, but IT'S JUST THE SMELL!
TEASE!!!!
UNIVERSAL MEAT TEASE!!!!!

Another reason I've got to finish recording Grind Show is that, starting in late September going into November, there is a whole sward of games coming out that I plan to consume, master and discard.
I've not had any games I've been itching to play at this time and I think that might also be helping bolster my motivation when it comes to recording.
Sometimes it's just easier to play video games, that's all.
Just like, for some people, it's easier to take the job with Virgin Galactic than NASA.
It's exactly the same thing.

And speaking of space, a recent thing I recorded mentions that crazy $30 million Google prize for the first private venture to land on the moon.
Call me ignant, but wouldn't it cost a fuckton more than $30 million to get ANYTHING to the moon...let alone a person?
In this script they also mentioned that there's more power in your iPhone than it the module that was sent to the moon in 69.
That's fucking nuts.
If that's true, why can't my fucking computer run faster?
I'm not sending it to the moon.
Fuckers.

All right.
I'm rambling.
Apologies.

I dug out the MC Honky album I Am The Messiah yesterday and reexperienced that.
There's a song or two on there that seems to be taking a shot at or emulating Beck's Midnite Vulture period.
Not bad, but nothing can be as greasy and glimmering as that.

Good.
Go.

* Bigger on the inside.