*Retard Happy Noise*

9.30.10

7:48 pm

Not a good retard happy noise.

Some chowder head at my job has this horrible forced look-at-how-jovial-I-am-looklooklook!!!! laugh he always follows up with this "that laugh just now didn't express how funny I thought that last comment was!!!!" noise that is basically a long drawn out "e".

Not like a tittering Japanese schoolgirl, just like a "man, we are just having the best time ever" noise.

I used to get annoyed every time he did it, but then I thought, what if he really is retarded?

So, I'm no longer annoyed with him, I just think he is mentally retarded.

Next: The Social Network soundtrack dropped Tuesday and I've been listening to it.

Yes I have.

Pretty much what I had expected based on that five track free sampler thing they released: it sounds a bit like stuff from the Ghosts record with more or less of one element or other.

Very solid for a film score, but it furthers enflames my curiosity: how the hell are they going to make such a dynamic and moody score work with the goddamn story of Facebook?!

Guess I'll find out this weekend, possibly with Kaitlyn, possibly with Ray, possibly with both or possibly alone.

Whatever.

Some stand out tracks include "Intriguing Possibilities", which has a great, triumphant chord progression and wonderful energy, "The Gentle Hum of Anxiety", an uneasy, emotive piece which causes the skin to crawl, perhaps because elements are slightly reminiscent of some Silent Hill sound work, and "In Motion", which makes one want to dance in the future.

There's also a version of "In The Hall of the Mountain King", which, despite being done by Nine Inch Nails, still feels whimsical and mischievous, but darkly so.

This Mountain King has a Korg in his Hall!!!!

Get it!?

WOO!

Weird side note regarding a few of the tracks: because of the "8-bit" instrumentation, some of the tracks sound like they're taken from the score to The Warriors.

I've also been demolishing Dead Rising 2.

Interesting and frustrating in the most Japanese of ways.

The game starts with a countdown of 72 hours (game time, not real time, I'd say three seconds equals a minute on the clock so...plus cut scenes and that...you have about 5 hours, give or take).

At the end of that time, the game ends; the military arrives and does their thing (whatever that may be, I'm hoping for a rescue and not a fire bombing) no matter where you are of what you're doing.

You have to manage your time in this game like none other I've ever played.

I won't bore you with the details, but the game has a lot of limitations so you can't really enjoy all the aspects of it.

You can duct tape a machete to the handle of a push broom and fucking raze hoards of zombies with it though, so, I'm happy.

Just last night, I ran over about a hundred zombies with a golf cart while tooting "Shave and A Haircut" on the horn.

It was...liberating.

I'm thinking that, by the time I'm ready to put down Dead Rising 2, The Walking Dead should be on.

That, friends and debutants, is what I call...SYNCHRONICITY!!!!!

TASTE IT.

Finally, I have been watching Rome (the show, not the country).

It's...dramatic.

This weekend, aside from doing Social Network, Chris and I will begin the decoration process.

Prepare to be blown away.

You know what?

Fuck that.

You CAN'T be prepared for what we're doing.

So.

Prepare, instead, to shit your pants...but in your brain.

That's right.

Brain Shit.

Ready yourselves.

See you in a month, muthafucka.*

* Spoken as Panthro

Cake, No Sodomy*

9.17.10

3:32 pm

Yes. Cake.

Yesterday, I took off from work to see Cake perform at Summerstage IN Rumsey Playfield. Up until Monday I didn't know the two were the same thing.

Thank you Central Park Recreations Committee, you scum.

Anyway, my sister and I showed up unnecessarily early (about 4:45 for the 8 o'clock show) and were STILL 5th and 6th in line after three people who were fast asleep on the ground when we got there and two guys sitting on a rock trying to look interesting.

Things were fine for a while, the power was being switched on and the instruments plugged in and then Cake started sound checking.

Then came the Thunder.

Then came the Lightning.

Then came the Flood.

For a solid ten minutes, the world kind of ended...all with Kathy and I huddled under umbrellas.

The sky was green/yellow/gray.

And wet.

Then it stopped.

Eventually, the music started again and Cake played about five songs (missing a horn or vocalist here or there) and we knew things were going to be okay.

Soon, a lot more people showed up including Lisa and her sorority sister, Lindsey, who, apparently, has been hearing stories about me for ten years.

I certainly hope I delivered, although without my army of dildos and whatnot, I don't know if that was possible.

All the more reason to have a few on me at all times.

More the fool I.

Lisa came equipped with four cup cakes in order to have cake...at Cake...get it?

Well, some guy announced that that was "clever", although his subtext was so clear he might as well have just screamed "I WANNA CUPPY CAKE!! ME ME ME!!!!" while tearing his face off with his teeth.

Pseudointellectual smarminess is no substitution for cup cakes.

Fucker.

Anyway, we were dead goddamn center on the railing for the whole show.

It was very much along the lines of their show last year at Terminal 5, except it wasn't raining inside Terminal 5.

A few tracks I didn't hear last time like Pentagram (a real treat as it's one of my favorites from their first ), Shadow Stabbing and a new new one called Away (which has a very Mexico feel to it) although I would have loved to hear Italian Leather Sofa and Short Skirt Long Jacket again.

They had the typical long-ass-sing-along to Jolene, Sheep Go To Heaven and Sick of You as before, plus the tree giveaway, all of which could have been replaced with an extra song or two, but, whatever, it's their show and it was fun.

Plus, fina-fucking-lly, they announced the new album title and, praise the Bulbous Melon of Goodness, a release date.

"Showroom of Compassion" will be released on January 11 or 18th, 2011.

Why it's taking them over four months to release an album which has been done for six weeks and anticipated for six years is something I'll never accept, especially in the age of Radiohead, Nine Inch Nails, Beck and a ton of other artists just self releasing their new works the moment they're mixed over the Internet.

Come on, releasing it on the Internet with save some trees.

You like trees, don't you?

You whiny ass hippy fucks...

Whatever.

The date has been set and it'll be Day One for me whatever the case.

I have to say though, getting twelve or thirteen new tracks (three of which you're pretty familiar with from their live show) after six years?

That's kind of harsh.

I understand that Cake aren't really the "double album" kind of guys, but throw us a bone here, please?

I was thinking of just asking them last night what took them so long, but that probably wouldn't have been received as the well-meaning, genuinely curious question it is.

Meh.

We'll see.

After the show, we staggered home and watched Clue.

That movie is still one of my favorites and, check this shit out, Tim Curry wasn't the actor originally considered for Wadsworth.

Now, I can imagine what you might or might not be thinking, who else could possible do as great of a job with role as Tim Curry?

Rocky Horror Picture Show?! Hellooo? Helllooooo?

How about Rowan Atkinson.

Or maybe John Cleese.

Yeah.

I suddenly wish I could dimensional hop and see those two versions of Clue.

Can...you...just...imagine...?

Augh.

Pain.

BUT, I take solace from the fact that, in some other quantum eventuality, another version of myself is, at this very moment, writing about how cool it would have been to have Tim Curry as Wadsworth.

*quantum sigh*

Changing the subject.

Reznor has been teasing us with the promise of hearing new music this week and, sure enough, this morning the Null Corporation, Reznor's new self run label, posted a new link on their website (http://www.nullco.com/) to the Social Network soundtrack pre-order page.

As usual, you get some free stuff.

Namely, five tracks from the score (which feature heavy titles like Pieces Form the Whole, Eventually We Find Our Way and The Gentle Hum of Anxiety).

You can also pre-order the soundtrack in its three physical forms: a CD for $8, a 5.1 surround sound Blu Ray disc for $20 and a double vinyl for $25.

With each pre-order you receive the five track sampler and the promise of the entire soundtrack delivered to your e-mail via a link at midnight on September 28th, four days before the movie drops.

AND from the 28th to the 30th, the whole thing will be available on Amazon as mp3's for $2.99.

19 tracks for $2.99.

Hey, Cake?

Fuck you.

I've been able to listen to those five tracks once or twice and they're good. A bit more involved that some of the Ghosts stuff, which feels a bit linear at times, and a bit more surprising as well.

Reznor seems to have followed up on his promise to "practice piano more" in his spare time.

But, how excited can I really get about a movie's score?

I'm excited for new Reznor music, but, no matter how compelling an instrumental piece of music is, I really have never found myself that into the genre.

Even now, I'll only listen to a handful of Ghosts tracks when I'm feeling...I don't know...atmospheric?

Whatever.

The music is good and, apparently, the movie is great.

Quite a few reviews have popped up for The Social Network and all of them speak well of it, most mentioning the soundtrack favorably as well, specifically, there's a rowing scene that keeps getting brought up.

So I guess Reznor, Ross and Fincher found a way to make all this dark-ass, moody music work with the story of Facebook.

Way to go guys.

I think that might bring me up to today.

Oh, I also picked up Space Invaders Infinity Gene from PSN yesterday.

Basically, it's Space Invaders fallen through a black hole and into the end of 2001: A Space Odyssey and everyone had done acid and cracked techno music to 11.

Mind.

Blowing.

One last thing, I downloaded a HUGE torrent of Warren Ellis graphic novel and comic stuff.

This man...is sick.

He also writes angry Brits better than anyone I've read.

He has his own Zombie Apocalypse title called BlackGas.

I've read the first mini-volume (three issues) and it's different from the typical zombie thing already. Hard to do these days.

I recommend it to any zombiephiles.

Also, his Emma Frost is the truest I've ever read, I can't imagine anyone voicing her better than him.

Going to Eels alone next Saturday.

Bummer.

Okay.

Fin.

*A little sodomy.

Bonch? Boonch? What?

8.31.10

3:45 pm

Fuck you, August.

I'll see you hell, you cockwhore.

Anyway.

I had forgotten about Ok Go until a day or so ago and I looked to see if they'd put anything out since their second album "Oh No".

Turns out they have!!!

It's called "Of The Blue Colour Of The Sky" and it's really a departure from what they've done thus far.

Some very interesting stuff and some stuff that is a little too interesting to be good, dig?

Like, maybe a bit too experimental for the guys that wrote "Get Over It", which might be the poppiest song evarLOL!!!11!.

Everything was distorted at one time or another: vocals, drums, guitars, bass, sometimes everything all at once which was just too much.

The only song I totally dug was called 'White Knuckles", but I'll give it another listen or two.

Probably.

Also happened to swing by the Social Network web site (http://www.500millionfriends.com/) to hear the first results from the Reznor/Ross collaboration. Some NIN fans/hackers discovered it's called "Hand Covers Bruise (no piano)" (leading one to believe there's a version out there...with piano). Feels a bit like Ghosts meets the Quake soundtrack. It's very dark and moody. Thing is, I'm concerned about how the hell they're going to make this music work with the film without making it seem overwrought.

We are just talking about Facebook here and "Hand Covers Bruise" seems a bit...I don't know...much?*

Whatever the case, I'll be there, Day One.

Another thing I'ma try to be Day One for is this new zombie game.

It's called Dead Rising 2.

Think one guy, trapped in a Las Vegas (although they're called it Fortune City) overrun by zombies. Anything you can put your hands on it a weapon.

Apparently there's a sense of humor to the game, but I'm not there for that.

I'm there for the fact that you're surrounded by literally thousands of zombies at once.

In fact, the PS3 version will be able to pack 7,000 individual zombies on the screen at once.

7000! That's almost 10,000!!

So yeah.

My sweetest dream is of a game the size of GTA IV with the graphics of Heavy Rain and the car/driving ability of Burnout Paradise in Manhattan during the Zombie Apocalypse.

You find lots of cars, obviously, but hardly any with gas in them. You find little bits of gas here and there and stockpile it so, when you find a car, you can fill it up and try it out, but only until you ran out of gas in a minute or so or made a wrong turn and found a street clogged with abandoned cars.

I think an MMO might be best, but that's far too much work for someone to do.

I'd need a team of hundreds.

Anyone have a team of hundreds?

Call me...

I want your hundreds.

Had an audition earlier today where they wanted a brain that sounded like Denis Leary.

I gave them what they wanted, but probably to no avail.

Bastards.

I have something tomorrow for a TV VO about...I don't know, some goddamn thing where they want me to be conversational, smart, confident, not announcery, friendly.

Yak.

Yak shit on yak balls.

Talking goat.

Drunken squirrel.

Joy of cooking.

Out.

*Unless there's a moment in the movie when someone's hand is covering a bruise and they play it then.